Visit from the Past

My self from a year ago came to pay me a visit today. My old self, 2005, came from almost exactly a year ago, from Oct. of last year in NYC.

2005 was dressed in my purple cardigan and brown boots. 2005 was walking with a bit of a limp as I had hurt my knee that trip. She/I gave me this notebook that she/I had written in, in which were pages and pages of furiously scribbled entries. No, not a diary, but more like thoughts...thoughts that 2005 brought and wanted me to keep in mind.

Reading the entries...I laughed to myself, nodded in agreement, widenned my eyes in amazement, and mentally thanked 2005 for reminding me of things I should have never forgotten. It was very insightful and refreshing to see myself as I was/am with no distractions. I can still remember how 2005 felt, and I'm sorry that she/I had to go through that, but at the same time I realise that if she/I hadn't experienced that then I wouldn't know a lot of the things I do now.

When you're suffering, it feels like nothing is worthwhile, and you rue whatever forces imposed the miseries on you. After the suffering, you realise that what you learned during that time is priceless.

The entries are too long to transpose here in entirety, but I hope to put in excerpts now and then.

Translation:
Last Oct. I had made a trip to NYC with some friends, but had had the rare opportunity to be alone a lot of the times. I carried a notebook around with me in which I had written in. It had been a pretty stormfilled time. I had hurt my knee, was by myself, and had closed things with K. Writing gave me an outlet that seemed like an oasis in the middle of the chaos. Today I happened onto the pages and pages that I had written, entries that I had written to myself. So it felt like I was hearing myself speak to myself. Kinda trippy!